Monday, June 19, 2017

Of people like me

  This weekend I attended Trans Pride, which I recommend if you're in the L.A. area. So much free stuff! Also awesome fellow trans people and finding community. But really, free food is powerful when you're poor.

It was a bit weird since I've switched back to girl mode, but I could still feel my guy side pretty strongly. So I introduced myself as "Dusk, but sometimes Rain." I have to remind myself that I'm still trans even in girl mode. I'm a nonbinary girl, who has a prince's heart always with her.

Anyway, outfit pic time! My dear friend and sorta mentorish person Raven made the pastry hat (which I always get compliments on) and a rose ring I'm wearing which sadly you can't see in these pics.

Check out Raven's clothing/crafting store here.

I also continued the saga of cleaning my room this week. There's not a huge difference but I finally hung up some art! 
Raven features prominently in this picture too, as the three little watercolors around the lamia are hers.  For Raven's art you can go here

There are a few other independent artists on that wall and I really wish I could remember their names or hadn't lost their cards, so I could send some business their way.  I'll update this post if I find out though! 

Wednesday, June 14, 2017

Of Pride

 This weekend I went to my first Pride, so I've been a bit exhausted. That's not the only...exhausting thing that's been going on this week but I'm not able to say more about that.

Anyway I have pictures of my outfits for the three days of Pride. So I'll post them, and that's about all I have energy for this week.

This is from the Trans Party on Friday.  That pin is the trans pride flag, but the reflective surface makes it hard to see.


 A few from Saturday~ (I was sunburned so bad by the end of it.)


My friend painted this flag with makeup. Ze is pretty good at it, no?

I like this picture a lot. The pose is me trying to be Kamijo from Versailles. You can also see Sheepie in her red bonnet. 

And one from the Resist March on Sunday. 

The red and white pin says "Hello, my pronouns are he/him." A very kind person insisted I have his pronoun button despite having just met me, so I wore it all weekend. It definitely helped with the dysphoria of "people can't tell that I'm a guy if I wear the clothes I want to."

Anyway, thank you for reading! Happy Pride!



Monday, June 5, 2017

Of a few lolita questions

I should probably move my post day to Monday.  There's a built in slot to write, whereas I'm apparently busier than I thought on Sundays?

I'm a little stressed these days, and not sure what to write about.  So after googling "lolita blog topics" and finding this post by F Yeah Lolita,  I'll try to tackle one or two ofthese questions whenever I don't have something to write about.

How about...3 things I wish I was told when I was a new Lolita.

1) The fashion guidelines are not as strict as people say they are.  Even brands break the rules sometimes. And anyway, creativity and an eye for artistry are really important. A lot of things can be lolita if you try hard enough. 

2) Someone having a different opinion or tastes from you does not make yours invalid! I can't stress this enough. If someone else says rectangular headdresses ugly and old fashioned, and you love the above headwear (guilty), then your opinion is the one that matters for your own wardrobe. 

3) This one is specific to me (or other moon cis people). Yeah... the longing for lolita you felt was probably low-key social dysphoria. So go get that fashion, ok?

That went by fast. Should I catch up on my lolita/goth blog reading or do another question? I think I'll do one more. 

5 pieces that every Lolita wardrobe should have, regardless of style

1) First of all, do you like dresses--whoops sorry,  OPs, it's been too long--or skirts and blouses? Or JSKs? You should have at least one dress or skirt or jumperskirt. I was going to include a blouse but you can get a nice one literally anywhere including thrift stores. 

2) A petticoat. This is sort of optional I would say (heresy, I know) but let's face it, you were probably drawn to lolita at least a little bit for the poof. Poof! Alternatively,  you can layer other skirts under it. I mean, no one's going to see your under garments (unless you consent to it and I'm not shaming that certainly). 

You know what's also optional? Bloomers. I personally love them because they are pretty and loose instead of tight, which is a godess-send for my sensory issues. But like I said, no one needs to know what you're wearing or not, underneath. If you're worried about people seeing things under that bell skirt, you can always go for shorts or tights or leggings or less of a poof. Poof!  

3) (and 4 and 5...?) Oh look I have three more items to fill. Well...shoes maybe? Then again you can get suitable ones any where (my current faves for lolita and also the rare occasions I ballroom dance are from a thrift store) and really, my size ten (US women's) feet are not going to fit into shoes from Japan. Probably.  

Now if you want proper boots, well, I sympathize with how hard those are to get. Although I guess that gets more into the goth side of things? Then again, my favorite boots are the lolita ones with the rounded toes, that lace up. Sigh. Someday. 

 Anyway, what you should do for your last three items is whatever you want.  Get more OPs. Get accessories that make you feel like a magical princess no matter what you're wearing. Get those fabled lolita boots. Or use that money and get thee to a meetup!

See you next time, my dear Ballroom dancers! And Blogger, please stop selecting everything when I'm on mobile.  





Tuesday, May 30, 2017

*Pic Spam* Of organizing and the continual process of coming out

Hello there! I'm late again. I knew I would be, because I went to a con this weekend. Well, a private event, sort of. A gaming weekend with a bunch of old friends (who long predate me, even, so there's legacy and history there) at someone's house, which has grown so big they call it a con.

I've gone several times. Many of these people I went to college with. They know me by my birth name and she/her. But this weekend they called me Rain and he/him. It was awesome.

On another topic (they both relate to life goals I guess?), I've been slowly organizing my room. I bought some pretty boxes from a Japanese dollar store called Daiso. I highly recommend them, and dollar stores in general. You can find amazing things without breaking your budget. Some of these boxes I'd think were brand (which makes me feel weird because as you may have gathered I'm kind of irked at the way the big brands kind of gatekeep the fashion).

I have a few pictures of how things are going, so I'll present them without commentary. (Not all of the organizer boxes are from Daiso, just the pink, black, and a few of the white plastic ones. They have roses on them!)










As you can see, it's mostly accessories and crafting stuff. I'm making room for my new sewing machine, as well as creating a space I'll enjoy being in. Without clutter. I hate how clutter has followed me all my life. 

Anyway, thank you for reading, my dear Ballroom dancers! If I've empowered you to clean or beautify your own space or do anything else, that would be cool! Please don't mind the centered paragraphs, as I can't figure out how to change them back on mobile!

Monday, May 22, 2017

Of managing one's time and well, coming out

Hello there! First, some updates. I got my gallbladder out in January and have some wicked scars. More importantly, I can eat again, though I'm trying not to overdo that while still being body positive.

Im also working again, both in the employment sense and towards my many goals, of which this blog has always been one. On that note, I'm going to try to post, should I have pictures or not, at least once a week. Say, Sunday. I'm late this week.

I have really missed blogging and I think there are people who need to hear what I have to say. I don't mean that in a vain way, but as I said before I want to be a lighthouse to people who share my identities or are on the outskirts. Heh, skirts. I can make some more of those because I finally have a sewing machine, which I am working up the courage to unbox. ...As soon as I clean my room.

You might have noticed I said identities. It's become more and more clear to me that my gender isn't what I thought it was. I'm nonbinary, specifically bigender. My girl name you already know--it's Dusk. (I usually don't tell people the full version in real life, so consider yourselves lucky to know me as DuskRose_Dreaming, haha. I love it but I worry people will make fun. I'm just too fantasy for them.)

A few years ago I realized that part of me wanted to be an aristocrat faery prince, so I made another name to match my first one. RainShadow_Raven. (I'm not sure about the underscore but it kinda feels "natural" to write my full names as if their screen names, because at least Dusk started that way). It took me a long time to connect that wish to my gender identity.

But now, in the real world, when I'm a guy I go by Rain. Dusk and Rain, my two favorite times to be outside, when the harsh Daystar is hidden. And I've been a guy for the last couple of months. So now that I can sew again, I'd like to work on both my wardrobes, because without lolita I don't really feel like a girl either.

You know what's cool? Sometimes I'll doubtless wear lolita in guy mode, so I'll get to be a brolita. I always admired them.  And I think the idea was resonating with me in a way I  didn't fully understand. On that note, I used to have really strong feelings about how guys should look (having long hair for example!) and now...I can be a guy who looks that way. I don't have to get invested in other people's appearance. Although I certainly always appreciate people who share my aesthetics!

Anyway, I want to blog as a nonbinary gothic lolita and goth girl/guy who is wiccan and gay and/or bi and a nerd and creates stuff. Yeah. And I'd be honored if I could help other people feel like they have a voice.

Thanks for reading.

--RainShadow_Raven
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