Of mental health stuff

Hi Ballroom dancers.  I'm quite late this week as you can tell.  I'm not sure if I've mentioned this before (although I probably have) but I struggle with mental illness. Mainly depression and anxiety, and they've been hitting me really hard lately.  It kind of feels like I'm lifting weights just to accomplish this post.

I know it can be scary to talk or hear about these things, but my point isn't to worry you.  Rather,  I want to let you know why I don't post sometimes, and I want to break the silence around mental illness.  And most importantly, I'd like to let other people know they're not alone.

Anyway, I'm still fighting to improve my life, and accomplish my creative goals. I think this week I'll unbox my sewing machine. And continue working on my webcomic a bit every night.

Oh the webcomic? It's about queer goth magical girls (totally not autobiographical) and some vampires and fae folk.  I think I've mentioned my characters before, in conjunction with the book I plan to write about them.  Speaking of relevant things, one of the other main characters, who's queer and goth and possibly magical but not a girl, has also had depression all his life. It's weird -- despite being the author, it took me a while to figure out what this strange heavy sadness was that my character Lorcan dealt with. Or to recognize it.

Anyway, thank you for reading.  I'll Keep you posted about the webcomic. Keep calm and goth on.

Of people like me

  This weekend I attended Trans Pride, which I recommend if you're in the L.A. area. So much free stuff! Also awesome fellow trans people and finding community. But really, free food is powerful when you're poor.

It was a bit weird since I've switched back to girl mode, but I could still feel my guy side pretty strongly. So I introduced myself as "Dusk, but sometimes Rain." I have to remind myself that I'm still trans even in girl mode. I'm a nonbinary girl, who has a prince's heart always with her.

Anyway, outfit pic time! My dear friend and sorta mentorish person Raven made the pastry hat (which I always get compliments on) and a rose ring I'm wearing which sadly you can't see in these pics.

Check out Raven's clothing/crafting store here.

I also continued the saga of cleaning my room this week. There's not a huge difference but I finally hung up some art! 

Raven features prominently in this picture too, as the three little watercolors around the lamia are hers.  For Raven's art you can go here. 

There are a few other independent artists on that wall and I really wish I could remember their names or hadn't lost their cards, so I could send some business their way.  I'll update this post if I find out though! 

Of Pride

 This weekend I went to my first Pride, so I've been a bit exhausted. That's not the only...exhausting thing that's been going on this week but I'm not able to say more about that.

Anyway I have pictures of my outfits for the three days of Pride. So I'll post them, and that's about all I have energy for this week.

This is from the Trans Party on Friday.  That pin is the trans pride flag, but the reflective surface makes it hard to see.

 A few from Saturday~ (I was sunburned so bad by the end of it.)

My friend painted this flag with makeup. Ze is pretty good at it, no?

I like this picture a lot. The pose is me trying to be Kamijo from Versailles. You can also see Sheepie in her red bonnet. 

And one from the Resist March on Sunday. 

The red and white pin says "Hello, my pronouns are he/him." A very kind person insisted I have his pronoun button despite having just met me, so I wore it all weekend. It definitely helped with the dysphoria of "people can't tell that I'm a guy if I wear the clothes I want to."

Anyway, thank you for reading! Happy Pride!

Of a few lolita questions

I should probably move my post day to Monday.  There's a built in slot to write, whereas I'm apparently busier than I thought on Sundays?

I'm a little stressed these days, and not sure what to write about.  So after googling "lolita blog topics" and finding this post by F Yeah Lolita,  I'll try to tackle one or two ofthese questions whenever I don't have something to write about.

How about...3 things I wish I was told when I was a new Lolita.

1) The fashion guidelines are not as strict as people say they are.  Even brands break the rules sometimes. And anyway, creativity and an eye for artistry are really important. A lot of things can be lolita if you try hard enough. 

2) Someone having a different opinion or tastes from you does not make yours invalid! I can't stress this enough. If someone else says rectangular headdresses ugly and old fashioned, and you love the above headwear (guilty), then your opinion is the one that matters for your own wardrobe. 

3) This one is specific to me (or other moon cis people). Yeah... the longing for lolita you felt was probably low-key social dysphoria. So go get that fashion, ok?

That went by fast. Should I catch up on my lolita/goth blog reading or do another question? I think I'll do one more. 

5 pieces that every Lolita wardrobe should have, regardless of style

1) First of all, do you like dresses--whoops sorry,  OPs, it's been too long--or skirts and blouses? Or JSKs? You should have at least one dress or skirt or jumperskirt. I was going to include a blouse but you can get a nice one literally anywhere including thrift stores. 

2) A petticoat. This is sort of optional I would say (heresy, I know) but let's face it, you were probably drawn to lolita at least a little bit for the poof. Poof! Alternatively,  you can layer other skirts under it. I mean, no one's going to see your under garments (unless you consent to it and I'm not shaming that certainly). 

You know what's also optional? Bloomers. I personally love them because they are pretty and loose instead of tight, which is a godess-send for my sensory issues. But like I said, no one needs to know what you're wearing or not, underneath. If you're worried about people seeing things under that bell skirt, you can always go for shorts or tights or leggings or less of a poof. Poof!  

3) (and 4 and 5...?) Oh look I have three more items to fill. Well...shoes maybe? Then again you can get suitable ones any where (my current faves for lolita and also the rare occasions I ballroom dance are from a thrift store) and really, my size ten (US women's) feet are not going to fit into shoes from Japan. Probably.  

Now if you want proper boots, well, I sympathize with how hard those are to get. Although I guess that gets more into the goth side of things? Then again, my favorite boots are the lolita ones with the rounded toes, that lace up. Sigh. Someday. 

 Anyway, what you should do for your last three items is whatever you want.  Get more OPs. Get accessories that make you feel like a magical princess no matter what you're wearing. Get those fabled lolita boots. Or use that money and get thee to a meetup!

See you next time, my dear Ballroom dancers! And Blogger, please stop selecting everything when I'm on mobile.